PANTOMERICA

Seeking Color In The US

blue

New Vrindaban Gopa

Maggie OwensComment

As we explored the grounds of the Hare Krishna golden palace, New Vrindiban, in West Virginia, we met Gopa gardening in the back. Here's what we learned about Gopa, Hare Krishna and New Vrindiban:

Name: Gopa

Favorite Color: “Blue,” Gopa says. “I’ve just always liked it. My eyes are blue. I like to wear blue. When I was a child, I got to choose the color to paint my room and I chose blue."

Originally from: The Detroit area 

How she came to New Vrindaban: “I came here when I was 20 — that was 40 years ago,” she says. “Some friends and I had been a part of the Hare Krishna temple in Ann Arbor but wanted to work on a farm, so we came here. It was a lot different than it is now. One car, one phone. There was none of this ‘palace’ stuff you see now. It was just a philosophy.” 

What she’s working on at New Vrindaban: Converting the whole garden to be completely organic.

Favorite flower at New Vrindaban: It’s a toss-up between the Love and Peace rose and the Europeanas. 

One of Gopa's two favorite flowers, the Europeana 

One of Gopa's two favorite flowers, the Europeana 

Blue In The Berkshires

Color 12, Color 37, Color 35, Color 42, Color 41Maggie Owens1 Comment

The Berkshires were so lovely, we had no choice but to give in to Mother Earth and go blueberry picking. 

HOW LUCKY CAN TWO GIRLS BE?

^^ I mean, look at that! Take a step back and really look at that. What splendid, splendid beauty can be found in something that just grows straight from the earth.

Who needs the big blue sea? Who needs purple mountain majesty? Who needs all that grandeur when you can find such striking beauty in such a small package? What a remarkable world we live in. 

... WAIT WTF WAS THAT?! WHERE DID THE CHARMING BLUEBERRIES GO?

Oh... phew. That's more like it. 

Isn't Mother Nature truly majestic? Even something as small as a blueberry holds, to its core, such fierce beauty. 

HOLY SHIT WHAT THE FLAMING TURD IS THAT?!  

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WHAT'S GOING ON? WHAT'S HAPPENING?! WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS?!

KILLLLLLLLLL ME. KILLLLLLLLLL ME. HAVE MERCY ON MY SOUL AND JUST KILLLLLLLLLLLLL ME.

Maggie OwensComment
"I like blue but I hate the blue house that's just down the street from here."

-Jane, who gives tours and works at the Grotto of the Redemption in West Bend, Iowa. This "blue house down the street" disgusted Jane so much that she readily gave us directions to go and see it ourselves. She thought it was that much of an eyesore and insult to her favorite color.  Judge for yourselves:

99 Problems And Ostriches Are Seriously ALL Of Them

Maggie OwensComment
Such an ass-wipe. 

Such an ass-wipe. 

Considering this is a color blog, we decided to go ahead and email a couple of “ostrich experts” about life through the eyes of ostriches. Specifically, we asked: “what colors can an ostrich see?” and “what do you think an ostrich’s favorite color would be?”

It’s been a full week since those emails were sent and NOT ONE DAMN OSTRICH EXPERT has responded. Are ornithologists the stuck up popular bitches at the lunch table of the science world? Are we nerds — too uncool to sit at this table at all? More updates on this later. 

It might be too early in our blog (literally the first day of our trip) to express a vendetta but there are some bitchy ostrich experts out there who have some major explaining to do (I’M LOOKING AT YOU DR. ROSALINA OF MARYLAND UNIVERSITY).

Day 1 And We Already Have Enemies

Color 36Maggie OwensComment

The first impulsive stop on our trip: Solvang, California. We were driving 70 miles an hour down a country road when we passed by a sign with some ostriches on it that read "Feed These Bad Boys." Obviously, we came to a complete halt and risked death to turn into the ostrich farm. Because, if you know us, you know we love bad boys. 

…That was a lie. I secretly check men’s credit scores and refuse to date anyone who has a number lower than 700. If he wears orthopedics, I’m in. He still jams with his A Cappella friends from college? MARRY ME ALREADY.  

A little thing about ostriches: they’re evil. They’ll eat the food right out of your palms and then they’ll go ahead and eat your palms. They’ll leave just enough of you to limp off and warn the others. Let’s just say, if ostriches join the robots, come the revolution, we’re all screwed. Think the Occupy movement but with more plumage.

The sign says "We Like To Bite." 

The sign says "We Like To Bite." 

Oh wait. I forgot this was our color blog and not just my bird burn-book. We found color #36 all over the ostrich farm, from the picnic tables to the benches to the fences.

Blues like this are thought to have a "calming and tranquil effect" on the body. They probably chose to decorate the farm with such a calming blue to distract you from the fact that you’re so dumb and bored, you paid $5 to feed beasts that have a taste for human blood and will become your merciless overlords some day. 

Bonus Fact: You're supposed to avoid blues when cooking and in the kitchen because blue is thought to boost metabolism and suppress appetites. That being said, the ostriches' hunger for human suffering and world domination was very much not suppressed by the blue paint.