First things first, the stones at Yellowstone aren't yellow. The whole park is named after the yellow limestone found more than 100 miles outside the park. As professional color bloggers, it's our professional opinion that this is, as we say, "fucking bullshit." (That's an industry term. Sorry if it gets confusing when we "talk shop." We'll try to keep it simple).
Upon finding out that no stones would be yellow, Maggie killed herself a couple of times and insisted we do a whole "Tuesday's With Morrie" schtick. She meant to say "Weekend At Bernie's" and was greatly confused when Ceil started speaking to her like the dying professor in Mitch Albom's novel.
We'd also like to mention that "Tuesdays With Morrie" is the worst book ever written or, in professional terminology, "emotional sewer swill." (There we go talking' shop again. Our bad!)
I guess there were some other pretty cool things to see in Yellowstone apart from fabled yellow limestone. Mostly, 3,468 square miles of pristine American beauty.
The geysers are perhaps Yellowstone’s most surprising and stunning feature. They appear prismatic and range from orange, yellow, green to blue. What creates their orange and green colors are living, pigmented microbes. The blue is refracted sunlight. The whole combination looks like Mother Nature’s mood ring (that bitch knows how to accessorize). It’s kind of amazing how many magic tricks nature has for you to see once you put down your shitty Mitch Albom novel!
One last gift from Moody Mother Nature? The bison. We were too Tumblr-obssessed / self-obsessed (same thing, no?) to come face to face with real bison at the bison ranch we paid to stay at so we thought we missed our chance entirely. Well look who we found:
On a personal Bucket-List level, this was phenomenol. On a color-blog level, this was a dull shitty brown (last time we speak so technically, I swear). Come on, Bison, do your part.
You know what we say to this bison?
“Accept who you are and revel in it”.
-From Snoozedays With Snorrie by Bitch Albom